nearly new

its late-
i cant sleep-
but have to rise early..
it's nearly the new year--
2010-CRAZY
- 10 years since the millennium fury,
20 years since i was 13 (which is clear as a bell-),
28 years since prince sang 1999,
and 30 years since i was 3...
to be three...

kismet turns 3 on Monday-
strange- to think though, that this is actually my fourth winter there (at kismet)-- i remember three winters already passing, and can see myself there- looking out of the back door at the snow piling up each time.. and i wonder- am i growing? does me staying here (the longest i have stayed anywhere) mean me growing wiser, or me growing stagnant? (maybe if i stay put i will find out??? our should i lean and reach and stand up walking some place further?)

-
i crave evolution
i want so much more than the face value of all of this...
i want the puzzle to come together.
i want the work, the strive, the hunt and find- and i want to capture all of it- like a flower press, like a water color, like a classic recipe, like a song in three part round harmony, and i want to fit in in in in...

new year.
same me
i'll wait
and see....